Saturday, August 23, 2008

Snow White and her menagerie

This story starts back when I was 9 or 10 years old. At the time we had a pet ferret, Francie. She had a cage, but it must've been normal for her to wander around as well. I was asleep in bed one night when all of a sudden I wake up and sitting on my chest staring straight at me is an animal. In my sleepy confusion I remember thinking, oh it must be Francie. As the fog cleared, I realize the animal is in fact a SQUIRREL!! Yes, a squirrel had somehow gotten into our house, climbed onto my bed and then my chest. I immediately sat straight up which made the squirrel jump off and go running. I then left the room, closed the door, and waited for my mom to get up and chase the thing out of our house. Needless to say, I've not been a big fan of wild animals since.
Fast forward a few years, I was married and living in Evanston. Along with wild animals, I also am not very fond of birds. The way they suddenly swoop down and screech at you is a bit terrifying. So of course luck would have it that as I was coming home one day I see a bird fly into a window right in front of me. Now, the bird is still alive yet clearly suffering. So I decide that I need to do something to help save it. I find a rescue place nearby, put the bird in a box and start driving it over, all the while having nightmares that the bird would suddenly recover and begin flying around the car. All went smoothly however and I arrive at the rescue place only to find out that I have to pay them to take it. I have to pay to save a bird that I don't even like all because I had the misfortune to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. I guess that bird spread the word because we were the bird's best friends when we moved to Tennessee.
First we had Charlie. Charlie was the bird kind enough to almost send me to my death. I was standing on a pillar outside our house to reach the hanging basket to water it. Not the brightest move I admit, but it was quicker than hauling out the ladder. As I reach for the basket to turn it, Charlie, the bird, flies out and flutters about 3 inches from my face. Perched up on a pillar is not the best place to be when this happens to someone scared of birds. Turns out Charlie had built a nest in our basket so we had to leave it be until the eggs hatched. Then, one day we're sitting out back and see birds flying into our house. Yes, into our house. Another mama bird had decided our vent was the perfect place to build a nest and have some babies. Imagine how lovely it was to sit out back and see baby bird heads pop out of an opening in your house looking for their breakfast. Luckily we were able to get them out and seal it up so we had no other flying friends visit.
That brings me to tonight. We decided we were going to grill steaks for dinner. Brad ALWAYS starts the grill, but tonight he and Kyle were at the park, so I decided to preheat it. I go outside, wheel the grill onto the driveway (we have no deck and it had to be moved away from the garage), open the top and see a huge pile of grass. My first brilliant thought was that Brad had mowed the lawn and emptied the grass into the grill. After I realized he wouldn't do that, I thought the wind must've blown really hard and blown grass clippings inside the grill. (Okay, I realize I'm showing my blondeness here, but these were really my first ideas!) As these thoughts left my mind, I didn't need to think anymore because the reason for the grass became clear. It was a nest and the mom who built it jumped out and ran for cover. She moved quickly because I couldn't even tell what it was. I of course screamed and ran away. Needless to say the steaks were cooked inside tonight. We later discovered the animals inside were chipmunks. 7 babies were left. After much debate, we, okay mostly our Texas neighbor Chris, moved the babies to a box in the hopes that the mom would come back and they'd survive. If we were still living in the south we could've grilled 'em up for dinner : ) I'm thoroughly disgusted and don't even want to contemplate what's going to take up residence next. Check out the pictures below if you're looking for some new pets. Oh and does anyone need a new grill?????

Unrelated to the story, Kyle's showing how excited he is about the upcoming football season. "Touchdown!!!"


Naruto said...

That is to funny!!!!!! Maybe this is a sign you should work with animals.

Tyler said...

THAT IS A GROSS NEST but kyle was cute!!!!!!!

Tyler said...

its not tyler its victoria on tylers account

kassandra said...

haha aunt Jill that is the funnest thing I have heard all day!! Best of luck with the next aminal encounter!!!